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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Pixie's LiveJournal:

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Monday, May 29th, 2006
10:55 pm
The Real Folk Blues
I've gotten to the point that I didn't think I would get to.

Life is a series of choices. No matter what you choose, you still have to make a choice, or you may as well not be living.

Shit. Or get off the pot. Just stop stinking up my bathroom.

Current Mood: Walking without Rhythm
Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
12:04 am
I swear to your god....
Someone posted that ^ on the BBS I'm kick around on, and I nearly died. I don't think anyone else has caught it yet.

Today was a trip. A busy trip. My check from Uncle Sam cleared. I discovered this when I went to withdraw some money for a trip to the thrift store.

"Wait a tick, since when do I have that much money in my account?"

Follow by cheering and woo-hooing in the parking lot the atm is located in.

Trip to said thrift store. This place is great. Every monday, they pick a tag colour. Everything with that tag colour is 50 cents. And some of it is nice stuff too. So I picked up some suitable summer work clothes, since I have practicially nothing that's good for warm weather and the semi-buisness attire of my job.

I also finally did something to my hair that I've been debating for months.

And I took pictures of it with the digital camera I managed to pick up for under 20 bucks.

If you don't want to see it until I see you next, don't bother with the link, just keep reading. Or, if curiousity kills the cat....

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v614/wingednothing/meagain.jpg

Otherwise, things are quiet. I tried to play FFX again, but realized belatedly that I am missing one crucial part of playing any PS2 game.

A functional memory card.

*sigh*

Current Mood: The Closest Thing
Thursday, May 4th, 2006
10:03 am
And I'd give up forever to touch you
Laundry day. Oh joy of joys and clean socks. I head to work in two hours, with plan on being there for 12. We're getting ready for inventory, and there is nothing that I like working on more actually.... except for the hours. I already work a standard 50 week, I'm pretty certain we need to hire someone to replace the three (count 'em, three) people we've lost in the last two weeks.

Fat chance.

So they are releasing a version of Star Wars on DVD that includes both the most up to date digitally remastered version, and the original theatrical releases of the original trilogy. This has me extremely excited. I've put off and put off and put off buying myself a copy of Star Wars, though why, I couldn't say (Being a sci-fi obsession, you'd think I'd own it. Technically, I do, but it's on VHS, and in NY to boot). See the title crawl to Star Wars before it was known as Episode IV; see the pioneering, if dated, motion control model work on the attack on the Death Star; groove to Lapti Nek or the Ewok Celebration song like you did when you were a kid; and yes, see Han Solo shoot first.

So I'm in. It's only available for a few months, September to December. Knowing Lucas though, they'll do something t stretch it and get some more money from it, but hell, a copy of that will be owned by me. It's essentially what I've been waiting for, I just didn't know it.

So may the Force be with you.... and off I go.
Tuesday, May 2nd, 2006
3:17 pm
Today For You
I spent nearly a half an hour typing up a post. It filled in on the events of the last few months, work, house hunting with Michele, delays in house hunting with Michele, Rowan, cell phones, stars, king sized beds, a particular 1982 bourdeux, New York and advil.

I deleted it because I sound like the only things that ever happen drag me down. That isn't the case. Sometimes I just get so wrapped up on what isn't going right, that I forget the things that could be so much worse.

Things are going alright. Even being in limbo.

It's been a year. Just a little more.

I've cried more this year than I have ever cried before. I've also smiled more than I ever thought possible, laughing louder and harder at it all. I have been happier, sadder, more wonder-filled, distant, immediate, more hopeful, more helpless, more independant, more in need of support, more stressed, more creative than I have ever been in any period of my life. I have, at the same time, never been more dead and more alive than I am right this moment.

This may or may not be a re-entrance into the world at large. We'll see. But I am always here.

Tomorrow for me.
Wednesday, January 4th, 2006
6:56 pm
Tank
It's been.... nine months? More? Since I've even logged in here. I supose that everyone comes back sooner or later. Life has been.... more than I've been able to handle for a while, and I'm learning how to be human again. I cope with things by sinking into an anti social haze, and only a small handful of people (Damn you and thank you Snooch and Seath), have kept my head above water. Not an excuse, not a good reason, but I forgot how to be people for awhile.

I didn't realize that my New Years resolution was to gain and maintain better contact with those I consider my friends, even if I haven't been there for anyone in far too long since today. We'll start this is a tentative hello, that I'm an ass, and that I've missed some of you a great deal.
Saturday, February 12th, 2005
9:44 pm
I'm feeling kind of sqitzy.... if that's even a word

Current Mood: squitzy
9:43 pm
because this is cracked out...

~wingednothing~



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Thursday, February 10th, 2005
10:38 am
No, I'm not living in the real world

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Age
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Pick a Weapon
How many people are on your death list?
Character
You are out... for revenge
# of people killed 644628
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LJ user you will kill entropyzdragon
Lj user who will kill you stevo6669
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Wednesday, February 9th, 2005
2:15 pm
Ego Stroke
I just had a great little head trip.

The Solgar rep came in to talk to me about a few promos, new items, etc. We talked for about an hour. During the course of that time, we discovered that I know more about most of his products than he does. He's been in the industry since 1973.

I rock.
11:42 am
So, talked to Tony. He's really sorry to see me go, and says that the door here is always open for me. He's also going to be trade-showing it here in the next month, and says he's going to start getting my name out there now, to see if we can't land me a rep job. He thinks I should apply at Enzymatic and get the little twerp that we currently have repping for us out of the job... hehe. But it turns out that Bluebonnet (one of my favorite companies) is going to be looking into hiring a rep for Ohio, Indiana... and one othe state, I don't know which though (since Tony couldn't remember either), and he thinks that I'd have a real shot at that job.

It's really good that they're taking this well, and even better that my boss, who has been in this industry since before I was born, not only thinks that I would "make a killer rep," but also is going to pull some strings for me.

Keep your fingers crossed people.
Monday, February 7th, 2005
8:13 am
Job season, not rabbit season
Ok, so I applied for three jobs yesterday, and will continue to do so.

One was for a management position at Bed Bath and Beyond. Not my idea of fun, but they pay well.

Next was for a rep position with Metagentics, a company that I am already familiar with and I happen to be fond of one of their lines already, one of the better calcium supplements on the market.

The third.... well.... the third is for a management position at a health food store. In Hawaii. Yeah, total pipe dream, and they probably wouldn't be able to pay me enough relevant to the cost of living down there. ::sigh:: I can dream, can't I?


Oh, and the Pats won, go Patriots....
Sunday, February 6th, 2005
12:22 pm
Legendary Groundhog Found Drunk Before Prediction
Punxatawny, Pa- The legendary "prognosticator of prognosticators," Punxatawny Phil, gave his adoring fans more than a simple weather forcast this year as his handlers found him belligerent and extremely intoxicted when they knocked on his door to summon him for their yearly rite of superstition.

According to witness reports, the self-absorbed groundhog stubbornly refused to emerge from his cubby, hurling severl empty bourbon bottles and inflammatory insults at the men instructed to kiss his earth-pig posterior in exchange for a glimpse into the future of winter's stay.

Calling the assembled onlookers "candy-ass simpletons," Phil asked to be left alone while he "slept it off" while making arrangements for his female companions to find their way back home.

The man in charge of the Groundhog Day festivities, Larry Dolan, refused to give Phil's ladies cab fare and demanded that the stodgy rodent come out and look for his shadow before the sun moved gracefully out of range.

Upon hearing this, Phil poked his nose out of the door and told his fans that his shadow was sleeping and that, if they wanted an accurate forecast, they'd have to come back tomorrow. Dolan became incensed as his town's only claim to fame was being jeopardized by the whims of a "glorified rat." He stuck his gloved hand into Phil's cubby, yanked the uncooperative hog out by the scruff of his fat neck and tossed him onto the ground as the crowd of stunned reporters and tourists gasped in disbelief.

Phil hissed menacingly, vomited up a gallon of cheap booze, and then proceeded to relieve himself onto a fake scenic stump while reporting to the crowd that "the winter of my life has now arrived," before collapsing into a heap of fur and passing out.

Dolan did his best to provied a feasible explanation for this extraordinary series of events, but was unsuccessful in convincing those in attendance that Phil's behavior was simply a result of "immense stress" and that he "truly loves his position as the foremost meteorologist in the county."

Following the crowd's exodus, Phils unconscious carcass was placed in a burlap sack, where he was transported to Greeling Farms Celebrity Animal Rehabilitation and Counseling Center for treatment. Greeling Farms is the same facility that helped Lassie #4 with his gender identiy crisis, Charlie Tuna overcome his suicidal tendencies after the sale of his fellow fish to tuna salad lovers, and the former Mr. Ed shake his dependency on methamphetamines.
Saturday, February 5th, 2005
12:21 pm
Ozy and Millie is usually a great web comic. I particularly enjoy the characters because they remind me so much of myself as a kid. Today's strip perfectly illustrates a similar happening. It's un-freakin'-canny.

Background: Mille was invited by Felcia (Read: In-crowd) to jump rope with them because they didn't have enough people. And Millie was... well... there.

Ozy: Did I see you jumping rope with Felcia's clique just now?
Millie: Yeah, but I got kicked out though.
Ozy: Really? What'd you do?
Millie: Oh, I got to.... artistic with the jumprope chants. It's ridiculous. If there was ever a medium that screamed out for a bit of freestyle rhyming innovation, it's the jumprope chant!
Ozy: Great artists are never appriciated in their own time.
Millie: Felicia's just jealous that she can't think of 27 horrible skin diseases that rhyme with her name.

If you wish to read the comic itself, go to www.ozyandmillie.org
9:46 am
So, here's the real down and dirty.

I have started applying for new jobs. I love my job, I really do. Except for a few minor irritations (::cough:: Shayla ::cough::), I really enjoy my work.

However, Nick is pretty sure that his current job has about 8 weeks worth of hours left for him. This is a bit of a problem. He'll be able to pull unemployment, but seeing as how that is a percentage of what he makes now, I need to make more money.

So I'm looking into something in the 35-40k a year range. Life is against me though, seeing that most jobs that pay more than 30K require a degree.

Which I am distinctly lacking.

So I'll be setting up a meeting with Tony and Kara and lay everything on the line. I know for a fact that the company can't pay me what I need to make, but this meeting will gain me several things:

1) The moral satisfaction of knowing that I didn't just give them a crappy two week notice. Seriously, there is no one in the freakin' company who isn't already a managed who is cut out for my job. They'll have to hire someone from outside, which can take forever. We've already been through that once with this store, I'll be damned if I'm going to do it again.

2) I will have Tony as a reference, which I wouldn't have been able to do if I was going all cloak and dagger on this. He thinks I'm the greatest thing besides sliced bread, so I know that a referal from him will really shine.

3) My referal from him will be even better, because I gave him lots of time to start finding a replacement. See points one and two above.

4) Tony might actually be able to help me find a job within the industry. I'd really like to stay with the Health Food/Supplements industry. I really enjoy it, and I've spent the last year and a half filling my head full to bursting with all of the information, science, and case studies on this stuff. He's got a suprising amount of clout, especially in the midwest, and he might be able to help me land a reps position in Enzymatic, Nuetricutical or even Bluebonnet.

Ok, I need to open the store now. More later.

Current Mood: blah
Monday, January 31st, 2005
11:36 pm
I am Rabies. Grrrrrrrr!
Which Horrible Affliction are you?
A Rum and Monkey disease.


HUrrah! Puppies!


Oh.. wait....

Current Mood: curious
9:45 am
A letter that I would like to send.
To the individual, or individuals, who broke into my car last night,

First, I'd like to say that I'm sorry that you feel as though you have to steal other people's belongings. Whether you feel as though it is fun, or the money you get from selling my things will get you and your children through till tomorrow, I'm sorry that you are in such a position. I hope that whatever money you may get from a handfull of cds and a fairly nice cd playering will go to worthwhile causes, and being able to feed yourself is indeed a worthwhile cause. If the money goes instead to alcohol or drugs, I'm even sorrier, because I know what a demon those substances are to many people, and I hope you find the courage and mental stamina to break its hold on you.

Second, I'd like to say thank you for not stealing all of my cds. I realize that I ferret them away in odd spots, but I appriciate the fact that you left my favorite cds. You got the one that was in the player, The Return of the Kind Soundtrack, but since it was a burned copy, I'm sure I can ask Bryan to make me another one. And after all, since you can't sell that one, hopefully you'll be able to enjoy listening to it as much as I have.

Third, again, I thank you. I spent the ride to work sitting in a medatative silence. I had forgotten how much relaxation there could be in something as simple as being lost in your own thoughts, instead of lost in music. I was able to truly breath in my car for the first time in a long time, and not have it be to some base, primal beat.

I hope this letter finds you in good health, and happier, knowing that you have taken something which does not belong to you. Because if you can't even be happy for doing it, why bother?

Yours Truly,
Heather, owner of
The black, 1998 Toyota Corrolla.
Sunday, January 30th, 2005
7:26 pm
Stolen
Yes, another one of those reply to my journal cries for attention. You know you all wish you had gotten to it first....

01. Reply with your name and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell what song(s) remind me of you.
03. Next, I will tell you who you remind me of, celebrity/animated or otherwise.
04. Last, i will try to name a single word that best describes you.
05. Put this in your journal
Thursday, January 27th, 2005
9:43 am
This one's for you sugar...
This is a clip from The Lord of the Rings, from the council of Elrond. Part of the converstation they didn't show you....

Nick, this is for you specifically, considering the icons you have currently been using a lot of.

http://www.elfgirl.org/Imagevault/images/mordor.html

Current Mood: devious
Monday, January 24th, 2005
12:59 pm
WHY IS MY LIFE A MAGNET FOR DRAMA!?
That being said... and thank you Bryan for the webcomic that I've stolen the title from.

Things have been absolutely nutty.

And I'm tired and cold. I don't want to be here. I want two or three days where nothing messed up happens and I can have a vacation from everything.

So, here's the story.

Heather is working by herself on saturday night. About two minutes to close, a gentleman comes in, asks about a product. The clerk brings him to it when the door dings again and another woman and her daughter enter. Man stays for only a few moments after they come in. Heather is confused, since she told him he didn't have to rush, she'd hold off closing until he was done looking. She speaks with the woman and her daughter for a few mintues, heading back up to the registers. The gentleman is hanging out outside the door for that time, then sticks his head back in to ask what the store hours were tomorrow. Heather replies, then looks back at the woman with a smile as he leaves. She has a worried expression on her face, and asks Heather, "Do you know that man?"

"No, I don't."

"Because he matches the description of the serial rapist that's been hitting stores where only one female clerk is working."

So she hangs out for a few more minutes, and Heather locks the door behind her.

Ok, enough of the third person.

I get home, talk to Barb, then call the police. I spent about an hour on the phone with them, giving a description, answering questions, and talking to the officer on duty. They told me to not be alone in the store the next day and that they would be sending people by to check up on me.

Nick finds the FBI site with info on the bugger. And lo, two of the sketches from his vics look eerily familiar. Just lose about ten pounds and they could have been him.

So yesterday I called in some favors and people hung out at the store with me. Nothing happened, no one showed up. Which is good. Nick thinks though that if he's going to show, he'll come later this week, probably next sunday.

So what am I doing? Making sure as fuck that no one is ever here alone anymore. We've been so understaffed that I've been pulling at least two closings a week alone and I've been working sundays alone for something like the last five months. So this is changing. Shayla's talking about just beating the crap out of the guy if he shows, but I keep trying to impressing on her that heros are not what we want. I'm a little worried that she'll try something stupid if he does show up. He's been known to carry a gun.

You know what Shalya asked when I said that? "So it's just a little gun that won't kill you?"

ANy gun can kill you. I am not willing to play this game, and if it means never having her close, period, forget about if she's alone or not, then so be it. I don't trust not to do something stupid because she thinks she's all that and a bag of chips.

I'm done for now. I still have work to do.

I'm just so freakin' tired.
Tuesday, January 11th, 2005
5:51 am
I'm thinking of looking for a new job. No, not just thinking, I know I'm going to. Robin, one of the women I work with, and I have been talking about it in depth, and she's pretty much convinced me that I could find a better paying job that isn't going to stick it to me with hours. So the job hunt starts quietly, without too much fanfare.

Wish me luck.
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